Impromptu Sausage and Mustard Pasta

Ingredients:
See method.

Method:
Wander around the shop wondering what to have until you see some nice-looking sausages. Buy them and take them home without much idea of what you are going to do with them. On the way, mull things over and decide on some sort of pasta-related dish. When you get home, open a nice bottle of red wine while you contemplate further.

I’ve had sausage casserole and sausage pasta before, but I find that if the sausages are cooked in the casserole or sauce from the start then of course all the fat cooks out into the sauce rather than disappearing, which gives me indigestion. So put the sausages into the oven to cook while wondering what sort of sauce to make. Chop up a red onion and a stick of celery and sweat these with a crushed clove of garlic and a sprinkle of thyme.

When the onion and celery have softened a bit, add half a glass or so of red wine (it’s really nice so you don’t want to waste too much) and wait for the alcohol to evaporate. Search through your store cupboard for a small tin of tomatoes. While you are searching, find some slivered almonds. Add the tomatoes to the pan, but keep the almonds aside.

Decide that sausages and mustard are good together, so add a teaspoon or so of wholegrain mustard to everything else. Have another look in your store cupboard for pasta. Wacky shapes are good if you can find any. Add a handful of slivered almonds to the sauce and cook the pasta.

Taste the sauce and season if required. When the pasta is cooked, drain it and add it to the sauce. Mix it all together and watch that you don’t splash onto your shirt. Take the sausages out of the oven and marvel at the coincidence that they are also done. Cut the sausages into bite-sized pieces and try not to eat too many of the pieces, even if they are really good. Mix the sausage pieces into everything else and serve. Garnish with chopped parsley if you have any (I didn’t).

Enjoy. If it’s not that great, blame the impromptu nature of it and add some more salt and pepper. Decide that crushed almonds would be better than slivered. Remember to keep a piece of sausage for your girlfriend if she’s out.